I have learned something about myself this week that has been right in front of my face all this time, but I never chose to acknowledge it: I take things personally.
If someone does something that has an impact on me directly, I assume it was done intentionally to upset me or to use me or to have some sort of negative effect on me. I don't want to be this way anymore. I want to act like an adult, not like a childlike "victim". I'm working on ways to change my thought processes so that when situations arise in the future I will not assume the victim role. It's tiring, it's damaging to my self esteem, it's counter-productive, and it likely damages the personal or professional relationship between myself and the other party. I need to fix this part of my personality before it's "too late" and I alienate everyone around me.
The fine line I have yet to let go is that I also don't want to be walked all over, so I'm getting stuck on the concern that if I give up the victim game I'm also giving up my sense of what is right and wrong for myself. I don't know if I'm on the right path yet, but the first step is acknowledging the problem, so I'm at least to that point.
4 comments:
I think this is great.
And be encouraged. It's easier than one would think to change those things about ourselves that at first are seemingly impossible to change.
:)
I do the same thing. I take it personally but I chew that person out for it and end up making an ass outta myself.....
Be careful. ;)
I do the exact same thing (mainly at work). As much as I try not to take things personally, it's hard, and it's usually an act when I let it bounce off. Let me know if you figure out a way to deal with it and really not let it bother you. I'd be interested in applying your technique to my situation.
I do the same thing. When you find a solution, let me know.
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