Two guys are driving through the desert on their way to Vegas when they see a sign: Mercy Whorehouse---Get Screwed by the Sisters of Mercy. Intrigued, they follow the sign's directions to what looks like a mission house. They aren't sure if they have the right place, but as they approach the door, they can hear moans of pleasure coming from within. They can barely contain their excitement as they pull on the bell at the entrance.
An older nun wearing her full habit opens the door and silently points to a sign: "Get Screwed by the Sisters of Mercy: $50." Now the men are really excited: Their Catholic-school fantasies are about to be fulfilled---and at a bargain price. They each place $50 in an envelope. The nun then takes a key, blindfolds the men, and leads them down a long, dark hallway. As they walk, they can hear moans and spanking and more. When they reach the end of the hall, the nun unlocks a door, gestures to the men, saying "Go forth," and then locks the door behind them. Unable to contain their excitement for another moment, they rip off their blindfolds---and realize that they are back outside.
They turn back to the door where they see a sign: Congratulations. You've just been screwed by the Sisters of Mercy.
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Here's one in honor of the Busty Nun:
Two guys are driving through the desert on their way to Vegas when they see a sign: Mercy Whorehouse---Get Screwed by the Sisters of Mercy. Intrigued, they follow the sign's directions to what looks like a mission house. They aren't sure if they have the right place, but as they approach the door, they can hear moans of pleasure coming from within. They can barely contain their excitement as they pull on the bell at the entrance.
An older nun wearing her full habit opens the door and silently points to a sign: "Get Screwed by the Sisters of Mercy: $50." Now the men are really excited: Their Catholic-school fantasies are about to be fulfilled---and at a bargain price. They each place $50 in an envelope. The nun then takes a key, blindfolds the men, and leads them down a long, dark hallway. As they walk, they can hear moans and spanking and more. When they reach the end of the hall, the nun unlocks a door, gestures to the men, saying "Go forth," and then locks the door behind them. Unable to contain their excitement for another moment, they rip off their blindfolds---and realize that they are back outside.
They turn back to the door where they see a sign: Congratulations. You've just been screwed by the Sisters of Mercy.
Three men had been stuck on an island for ten years.
Just as they were about to give up hope, one of the men finds a magic lamp.
The first man wished to be 10% smarter, and then he was able to make a fire and send morse code smoke signals for help.
The second one wished to be 25% smarter, and suddenly he knew how to build a sturdy raft capable of getting them all off the island.
Then the third man wished to be 50% smarter, and he turned into a woman and walked across the bridge.
Why do elephants wear red toenail polish?
So they can hide in the strawberry patch.
what do michael jackson and santa claus have in common?
they bother leave little boys' rooms with empty sacks.
(sorry... that was inappropriate. i couldn't help it)
bother = both (oooppps)
Awesome jokes, everyone. Thanks. :)
Here's a dumb one:
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
Ha!
Orange you glad I didn't say banana?!
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