Sunday, May 06, 2007


Dear neighbor kid with your stupid fucking go kart,

Stop driving it up and down the street. If you do not stop I will come outside with a dozen eggs and throw them at you as you pass by.




Helen said...

You crack me up! Really!

Molly said...

aaaaaaaah yeah! fuck eggs...try throwing something more rocks.

Kristen said...

People look at me funny when I say I love the winter and the snow. THIS IS WHY.

In 2003-2004, we had next-door neighbors that had a 4 year old. His name was Cody-NO (I never heard his mom call him anything else), and he had the most obnoxious plastic lawnmower toy that ever existed. He would drag that thing back and forth for hours, and considering that his mom couldn't stand the sound of him talking ("Hey Mommy?" "Shut up, I'm tired of listening to you!"), I'm surprised she didn't just throw the thing out. I had dreams of melting down the obnoxious clicky parts with an acetylene torch at night.

Mr. Fabulous said...

May I suggest a length of piano wire stretched across the road?

Here he comes, zipping along, and TWANG, no more head.

Avitable said...

Good idea, but instead of eggs, use rocks, and instead of throwing them, use a slingshot.

Poppy Cede said...

Helen - Haaaaaaaaaa!

Spénce - At least I didn't threaten to use a gun, which is everyone else's solution around here.

Molly - Our rocks are for decoration. :)

K - That is AWESOME! If I ever have kids I will name them Samantha-NO and Willem-NO! YAR.

Mr. Fab - You are truly diabolical. LOVE it.

Avi - Slingshot! That is a fantastic idea. May I borrow yours? :)

The best part: As soon as I pressed Submit on this entry the little bastard stopped driving his stupid fucking go kart up and down the road. BLOGGING WORKS, PEOPLE.