If you wear black pants and a black shirt one of your kittos (or doggies or ferrets or buns or hamsters or or or) will go missing. I was not covered in fur at 7:50am. By 8:50am I was sobbing because Hay had finally located Georgie with a flashlight. He glimpsed her inside the boxspring of the guest bed after an hour of searching. The cats had ripped away the bottom lining at some point and Georgie crawled in and headed to the back, where she preferred not to be disturbed. I was just so happy to see her that I lied down on the floor. Ripley came up to me to see what was wrong and rubbed up against me, so ...yah. I didn't bother changing, so I'm the lady in furry black today. :)
When my kitties go missing here is my thought process: She got out. A dog ate her. A car hit her. She ran away and doesn't want to come home. She ran away and can't find her way home. The builder dude took her in spite. The builder dude killed her in spite. Somehow Hay knocked her out (by mistake) when putting together a load of laundry and she's unconscious and drowning in the washing machine. She broke her neck trying to jump somewhere and now her dead body is lying somewhere hidden in the house. She has vanished. She hates us. She has gone deaf. She is scared. I'm a bad mom. I'm an awful mom. I don't know what else to do, I don't know what else to do, I don't know what else to do. Oh, Hay is making a sound like he has found her, did he find her?!! No, he didn't. I'm a bad mom. *sob* *SOB* *SAHHHHHHHB* Why me? Where is she?! Georgie, please come out, I just want to see you. I promise we aren't putting you in the basement today to keep you safe while the builders come in and out of the house. I promise!!! Ripley, WHERE is your sister?! Allie, WHERE is Georgie?! Hay, WHERE IS SHE?!?!?!
I'm exhausted now. Do you know how awkwardly embarrassing it is to have to write to your supervisor that you'll be late to work because your furry kid has gone missing? Luckily she understands, but my other supervisor (over there *point point*, yes I have two) would not. He has no kids and no pets. I just hope Georgie understands that I love her and don't want her to be harmed. But, probably not.
In other news, the black pinstripe pants I just bought online because none of my pants fit anymore after I lost so much weight - yah, they're too big, too. I don't know why, but I didn't trust myself and ordered one size bigger than the size I knew I was when I tried on 20 pairs of pants in a fitting room a few weeks ago. These pants are actually two sizes too big. So, for the sake of argument, let's say I'm a 12 but I got a 14, and I guess these pants would have fit me in a size 10, but I'm not actually saying that's my size, because that would be admitting to all the 0's and 2's out there that I actually have curvy meat on my bones, and to anyone larger they might be bugged by the smallness, and I just want everyone to like me.
Okay, really, another busy day. I hope all is well with you all and that you're not affected by the rumor that Avril Lavigne is preggers even though she's supposed to be some sorta hard rocker chick who now is...a model. Whatever. Youth these days, getting so confused... I'm happy for her if she really is pregnant, as long as she takes care of herself while growing her kiddo.
7 comments:
Aargh, you poor thing!! I'm sorry you went through that. I know how it is to have to call in (or go home) because your baby (pet) is sick or needs you, but you know what? So what. If people can't understand that pets ARE our children, they can [censored] off. They are. In other words WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT about your pants and weight loss!! I am SO PROUD of you.
heh. i think some furry kid people are even more neurotic than people who have non furry kids.
but that's ok. our animals love us. well, probably not, but i bet they like the food. ;)
You should get a remote locator to affix to her collar. Then you'd be able to hear if she was around or not. You press a button, the locator beeps... all is well. ;-)
Glad you found your kitty. Last year we had 15 kitties. Over a four month period we lost more than half. We never found out what happened to them. One of the missing was a momma kitty who left behind two nursing babies. Not knowing is hard. Was it the Opossoms, was it a neighbor with a BB gun? Recently, two of our missing showed up on the porch at feeding time. Talk about shock and joy! I just wish I knew what happened to the rest of them.
My cats did the exact same thing with the box spring. Little bastards.
Also, my calico, Zelda, does this thing where she flat-out disappears. I look EVERYWHERE for her, and she is just gone. Normally, she is very chatty, and will meow back if I call her. But not when she is doing her vanishing act. The only thing I can figure is that she has a little portal to another universe, like a Stargate thing or some such shit. Eventually, I will give up looking for her, and then I will turn around, and there she is, sitting behind me, all cute with her tail wrapped around her paws. "meowmeow-meow" she will say. GRRRRRRR.
!!!!! EXACTLY!!!!!! Oh my doggy, that is what Georgie does. And sometimes Allie. I remember once Hay called me at work to tell me he couldn't find Allie anywhere so I left work early, drove 100 mph to get home, then as soon as I showed up he said "she just walked out of nowhere, and here she is!"
Cats. Hmph.
Oh, and Georgie is very vocal until she disappears and then she is silent as a mousie. *sigh*
Obviously Georgie & Zelda are hanging out in The Top-Secret Cat Portal with all of their other friends, laughing (meowing?) about how worried their owners are.
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