When I was 7 I was a latchkey kid. My house key was on a keychain with a beautiful blue and green glass butterfly. I had a slight habit of forgetting my key at home so I would sit outside until Mom's boyfriend's son came home from high school with his key to let me in the house.
One fateful day I got on the schoolbus having to pee, but decided I would just wait till I got home. When I arrived I searched my backpack for my beautiful butterfly, but she was nowhere in sight.
I waited for 20 minutes, trying my hardest not to think about the fact that my bladder was about to explode. I was wearing my clogs and my favorite pants, so I really didn't want to soil them.
Fast forward to an hour later. I could hold it no longer, so I stood up on the front stoop of my house and pissed down both legs.
Five minutes later high school boy came around the corner, looked at me, shook his head, unlocked the door and left me standing in a pile of pee.
I never forgot my butterfly again. Lesson learned.
Apparently when celebrities piss their pants it's more dignified and does not leave a lasting mark on them. But, they have enough other embarrassing experiences to worry about, so in the grand scheme of things I guess my pant pissing for all the neighborhood to see is small potatoes.
5 comments:
"If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis"
--Billy Madison
bdogg is totally on the right track here...
I had no idea that Billy Madison had such a huge impact on the entertainment industry.
Are those photos real??
The Fergie and Jenny photos are real, the Paris photo is "art" courtesy of LA. :) Paris was wearing a white dress the day she peed herself. Yes, I am way too up on my celebrity news.
No, you're good; I am the one slacking. The Fergie and Jenny ones looked real, but I can't see Paris allowing herself to be caught with her pants down, er...wet.
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