Thursday, March 17, 2005

Bizzy inferno

Is Biz Markie selling the shirt off your back? Just got this email update from TShirt Hell:


Celebrity Fit Club is over and now I can finally get back to gorging on Slim
Jims and Peeps followed by my purging into the mouths of Ethiopian children.
(oh boo hoo yourself... I don't see you contributing to the cause. They
gotta get their food from somewhere even if it is regurgitated from yours
truly's sexy mouth).

For all of you that don't realize by now, I was one of the fat pigs on
the show. Which one? Hint: I know that Stubby Baldwin has a 3 inch cock
(that drugged-up bitch tried to stick that tiny thing into my gaping,
chocolate hole of deliciousness) and I also know that Mia Tyler smells like
Biz Markie's balls (she loves balls). Speaking of Mia Tyler, did I mention
that she smells like Biz Markie's balls?


I *love* Celebrity Fit Club, but have yet to watch the finale. My guess is that Biz is the author and therefore the owner of TShirt Hell. Biz, you rock! I'm definitely ordering your pizza! (Click here to see what the hell I'm talking about.)

I highly recommend that you become a Lazy Little Bitch which also grants you the privilege of receiving the monthly newsletter.

1 comment:

Poppy said...

I recorded the finale to my DVR, but then we got a new DVR and I never got to watch the finale! :( VH1 had this info:

"The final episode of Celebrity Fit Club begins with a trip to an exclusive Hollywood salon, Prive, courtesy of Star Magazine. The makeover and the new clothes will help show off their new and improved bodies. But when they arrive at Fit Camp for the final weigh in, they all fly into a rage when they realize that Daniel Baldwin has failed to show. His teammates are devasted; their chance of winning the competition now severely undermined.

As the weigh-ins begin and we track their final week, we follow Kim on a blind date timed to celebrate her sexy new appearance. She is ecstatic when she gets a look at who she's been paired up with.

Later, the cast is given an eye-opening look at just how much fat they've shed when Dr. Katz brings in some slightly grotesque visual aids.

They are also put to the test in a final fitness assessment and everyone sees a marked improvement from their results of just three months earlier

But what's going on with Daniel? Over the final few weeks his behavior was erratic - he barely made it to an earlier weigh in, arriving at the end of the day looking like a complete wreck. And now this, a no show for the final episode. Well, the Celebrity Fit Club producers finally caught up with Daniel and got the real story; a story both shocking and devastating.
And finally, the two teams weigh in and the final figures are announced. For that winning team, it not only means looking better and being healthy, it also means walking away with tens of thousands of dollars in prizes."


What was wrong with Daniel?!?!?!?!?! They don't say!!!