Thursday, July 05, 2007

Would you like highlights or lowlights? Because lowlights cost more.*

There were no fireworks. My town is, yup, an asshatted assclown and, despite all the boooom-booooom-booooooooooms going on in every single surrounding town our elected officials (I DIDN'T VOTE FOR ANY OF YOU, YOU BUNCH OF REPUBLICANS!**) decided they'd rather not get a little wet. Fuckers.

I had really good food. Cheddar bratwurst, macaroni salad, red potato salad, mixed green salad with a dijon-dill dressing, Cape Cod salt & pepper chips with french onion dip, BEER***, and fresh made from scratch strawberry shortcake. YUM. I just made myself hungry all over again.

I tricked myself into getting invited to the beach on one of the days I have off this month where I originally had plans to go see ACW and Mel (oh, and see my cousin get married) but that has been postponed (because my cousin is now getting married in September...don't ask).

I got felt up by both my friends, and by one of their 2-year-old children. (At least the 2-year-old used a cat toy. My friends just got all handsy on me.) (Yes, this is all much more innocent than it sounds. Apparently it's fun to touch my Old Navy low rise ultra-thin cord something-or-other pants. They do make my ass look fabulous, and now I am less creeped out that my stepmother always comments on those pants when I wear them.)

The house is clean! Because people came over! The house is never clean! Because we're lazy! Have I ever mentioned that I totally suck at cleaning? I can keep the cats fed, the litter boxes scooped, the bills paid, the dishes done, but everything else is not my responsibility. And there's very little Hay claims responsibility for as well, so that leaves the cats to do vacuuming and sweeping and dusting and surface cleaning and and and. The cats? Very lazy.

I forgot to mention the bats! While we were sitting outside in the bug tent waiting for the fireworks that never were to be we kept seeing bats swooping around in front of us. Beautiful. I love bats.**** We're going to put up a bat house now to attract them to sleep near the pine tree. Yay. :)

*Or maybe that's just a rumor.

**Not all republicans are awful, but these republicans encouraged "4 more years" of a dim-witted monkey and his sinister organ grinder in office to happen.

***I only had 3/4 of one beer because the night before I drank 3 and my kidneys are delicate. :)

****You know I love all animals, but bats are adorable.


bdogg_mcgee said...

I like bats too!!

We had fireworks, but we didn't have plans to see any of the shows (no rain yesterday!) and at about 9:00 or so we heard "BOOM BOOM BOOOM" and went into our backyard and noticed that we had a perfect view of our city's fireworks show. Totally made my night!!

My house is clean too. That's seriously f-ed up.

anonymouscoworker said...

Bats like lots of sun during the day, a clear entry path to the box (no branches or anything), at least 10 feet off the ground, and near water (so there are lots of bugs).

I REALLY like bats.

Tug said...

BATS? You like rats with WINGS?


Jen said...

Bats are cool.

Lowlights cost the same as highlights here, but I can't speak for anywhere else.

Counting on cats to do your vacuuming, sweeping and dusting will only leave you disappointed. And with a dirty house :)

Kristen said...

I love bats three! I want to make a batbox so that they can live near me and eat all the damn mosquitoes because they LOVE to eat mosquitoes. If you google BATBOX you can find plans to build your own or buy one off someone who makes them. :)

Poppy Cede said...

B - Yay to bats. :) We get a perfect view of fireworks too! Okay, I need to come visit you for 4th of July next year, or you need t come visit me? We just won't tell Hay you're coming. :P

ACW - THANK YOU. Hay knew all of that except the clear entry path to the box, so now we have the perfect spot picked out on our land.

Tug - I also like pigeons. I am not kidding. And rats. Still not kidding.

Jen - I heard that lowlights cost more, but I don't remember where and I've never bothered to check, so it's probably just a horrible myth. As for cats cleaning the house, you are so very, very right.

K - Hay already knows which online plans he plans to use. I'll just stand around and look pretty while I hold a 16' 4x4 in the ground.