psych-o

Monday I was the happiest little 31-year-old you've ever met. I was basking in the glorious holiday season. I was dreaming of a White Christmas. I was looking forward to every single holiday party I was required to attend. Then, the shit hit the fan and I almost got a divorce, went temporarily insane in part because of my birth control pill/lack of hormone to keep me happy, almost got a divorce again, and could not speak to Hay without screaming at him.

I am overwhelmed by this holiday season. It's too much stress, too much to be done, and I am having a very hard time taking it one task at a time. I'm going to be very happy when this is over with.

My doctor tried to put me on depression medication, but I told her I wasn't in a state of depression, my hormones were just out of whack so she prescribed me birth control pills with a consistent hormone level. If the hormone change doesn't work I'll give in, but I really think it's just the house situation coupled with the holiday season coupled with wonky hormone levels. Happens. When I went to pick up my new birth control pills I told my favorite pharmacist (yes, I have a favorite) that I knew I had another batch of pills that I wasn't done refilling yet but this new kind was supposed to help me not be crazy anymore. She almost laughed, which is the reaction I was attempting to invoke, but she suppressed it, the professional lady that she is. I know she wanted to laugh - I've laughed a lot with her in the past.

I'm pretty excited to come back in my next life as an asexual plant. Or, maybe an asexual jellyfish...